Members Only: The Devastating Effects Of Being a Non Member Since 1984….Guest Spot by Marietta Rodgers

BOURGEOIS ALIEN

somethng happens

Guest Spot by Marietta Rodgers

Members Only: When you put it on, Something happens…

Alright, but what exactly? We’ll get to the members, but non-members claim not having the jacket resulted in isolation, loss of friends, weight gain, and night terrors. And many say that to this day, they can still hear their classmates calling them Dickless, Dickweed, and Limpdick…

Wow, positively tragic. Dick-based insults truly hurt everyone.

So, when did it all start? Well, it was in the year 1980 that JP Apparel World first launched the Members Only jacket onto a fashion hellscape ruled by parachute pants, jellies, and cheap plastic accessories. In this neon-fueled party of dumpster-fashion, The Members Only jacket ‎was the crème de la crème of tasteless street apparel. The racer jacket, which reached its height of popularity in 1984, was distinguished by its narrow epaulets, collar strap, and most importantly the label, Members Only stitched…

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