THE MORDANT SCRIBE

Cynical musings of an absurd mind.

Who Cares about Body Image: Barbie Gives Girls Unrealistic Expectations of Career Opportunities

barbiefist

We all know that Barbie’s impossible body proportions, lead to self-destructive behavior and eating disorders in girls, in an effort to obtain society’s definition of beauty, but we’ve already lost that battle thanks to movies, magazines and social media. Let’s focus on the real danger Barbie makes on impressionable young girls. Barbie sells pipe dreams to little girls. Princess, Sea World Trainer, Street Rapper…when is the last time you saw a job listing for “UNICEF Summit Diplomat” on monster.com? Job agencies are baffled by the Barbie phenomena.

“You might as well put ‘unemployed’ on your resume,” Joel Harper a representative at jobexperts.org. said.

There has been an alarming trend especially among Millennial’s, who have grown up with parents catering to their every whim, so they don’t damage their fragile psyches that are hanging on by a thread. A generation that is susceptible to everything they read on the internet wants to emulate their favorite Barbie; the allure of becoming a Pet Stylist for a celebrity is too enticing. Job Recruiters are finding it hard though to match these skills with potential employers.

“It’s my job to window dress these turds, so that I can entice employers; it’s almost impossible. I had to change one young ladies title on her resume from ‘Ocean Treasurer Explorer’ to ‘Certified Underwater Investigative Salvager’ and use words like, ‘under water odyssey.’ I work entirely on commission,” Rob Stanley Corporate Account Manager at Executive Resume Writers Inc. said.

These young women have to return to school to acquire new skills, mainly those applicable to getting actual jobs. It has become an increasing burden on parents that they still have to support their twenty-something daughter, who is eating into their retirement savings.

Beatrice Stall, former employee at the Mattel Corporation, explains part of the problem. “It’s the damn accessories. The company zeros in on what young ladies want. I mean pom-poms, castles, ball gowns a pink and purple wet suit, jobs don’t come with these kind of perks in real life unless you’re a stripper. These girls think it’s like Sex and the City and it makes it seem like Barbie is in a lucrative career. In reality, all she does is promise broken dreams.”

Surveys taken with young ladies between the ages of 18 and 28 say they are getting tired of the typical career path; they want excitement. They don’t want to end up stuck at a desk all day; they want to be able to take cool selfies of themselves with a sea turtle to post on Instagram. For decades Barbie has portrayed an unobtainable body image that causes girls to lose confidence in their looks, but what is destroying feminism next to unemployment in this economy.

8 Comments

  1. Oh dear. Bad Barbie! But lordy, how I commiserate. I’m tired of the typical career path, too, and wouldn’t it be wonderful to be a Hollywood snow expert instead?

    Another cheek-tensor post, Marietta. Smiling all the way to the toy box.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m still hoping that someone needs a soda fountain waitress.

      Like

  2. Love your sense of humor, Marietta. Poor Barbie. First, little girls want an impossible figure, and now, they want an impossible career…like US President. (I couldn’t resist.)

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Also missing is the behind-the-scenes benefactor. For Barbie to drive the cars she drives and to live in an elaborate dream house having no visible means of support, there must be some unseen sugar daddy in the background writing checks for all this. Ken’s just the hapless gay best friend she presents as he boyfriend when too many people start asking questions. Either that or she has a perpetual GoFundMe account set up for some sort of mysterious illness or calamity that never seems to get better or worse.

    Liked by 1 person

    • You just gave me a great idea. A Trump’s Wife Barbie.

      Like

      • She almost meets the physical dimensions. I think you’re on to something.

        Liked by 1 person

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